Saturday, July 9, 2011

Ageing Gracefully (Ha!)

Coming up on my 58th birthday later in the week.  This is how I look at it:  at 57 I can round my age down to 55.  After the birthday, I will be mentally rounding UP to 60.  I'm 60.  I can read all the comic books and play with all the robot toys I like, but I'm still pushing 60 in a handcart.  60.  Yikes.

How am I celebrating?  Not too much.  I already got the phone call yesterday from my gastroenterologist's office reminding me that I'm due for a colonoscopy in September.  (Happy birthday!!)  They will be sending the necessary instructions and prescriptions via snail mail, but the bottom line is that one night in September I will be essentially tied to the toilet while chugging a gallon of lollipop-flavored horse sweat.  Oy.  (I was actually going to type "Oh joy!  Oh rapture!" just now, but my hands beat me to "Oy."  A Freudian slip of the fingers??)

So there's that.  And yes, I realize fully the importance of regular examinations, particularly as a sufferer from Crohn's Disease, which means, among other things, that my risk of colon cancer is approximately a hundred times greater than that of the general population.  So if you're over 50, see your doctor and set up an exam.  Colon cancer is a lousy death.  Doesn't mean I'm looking forward to anything but the exam being over for another two years, though.

I'm sure my family will do something lovely for me, and we're planning to dine out on the semi-big day, but for some reason I can't get that colonoscopy out of my head today.

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